The Jeremy Kyle Show

the jeremy kyle show

The freak parade of tattooed, brain-dead,
Manky, skanky, brown-toothed sorts,
All proud of having copulated
With some bloated walnut corpse.
They carry asbos, needles, pimp-cards,
Done for car crime, fraud and looting.
Airbrushed Kyle, exasperated,
Struggles not to put the boot in.
It’s one long sideshow full of grime
And creatures that could use a bath.
It car crash telly at it’s lowest
Ebb – not even worth a laugh.

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14 responses to “The Jeremy Kyle Show

  • Cubby

    I keep myself pretty clean thank you very much…and the baby’s not mine, no matter what the DNA results say.

  • suzywordmuser

    My pet hate, is the Jeremy Kyle show! 😦 I can just about bare to watch a few minutes of it, just to get some ideas for some characters in stories, but sometimes I wonder if their characters are just so terrible, no-one would want to read that!

    And as for Jeremy – crafty bastard!!! I never could trust a man called Jeremy! 😀

  • John

    I think these shows are horrid … but, at the same time, I think they fulfill certain needs for people… one, to have their moment of ‘fame’ on the tv…(and, they’re usually paid rather well) and, two … I think people watch them in order to feel better about their own lives. Many people need to judge others in order to feel good about themselves. Sad.

    Great poem though!

    • Brian Hughes

      Cheers John. My problem with Jeremy Kyle type shows is that they seem to glamorise what is, essentially, the most revolting way of life anyone can lead. They seem to wear an appearance on Jeremy Kyle like a badge of honour.

  • Anonymous

    Jeremy Kyle is no laughing matter. Although there was one show where Jeremy was giving out the results of a paternity test to these two men, and he says, well it wasn’t you …….. and it wasn’t you either, and this woman in the middle looks stunned, then she says, oh, yes I remember now, could’ve been someone else

    • Brian Hughes

      I don’t understand why these blokes sleep with these hideous women in the first place. I realise that they’re not exactly stunners themselves, but haven’t they got any pride at all?

  • Anonymous

    Well, it’s probably the best opportunity they have, who else would sleep with them?

  • Jo

    Oh god this show, I don’t watch day time telly at all just in case I accidentally happen upon it and my soul explodes. Horrid.

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